Thursday, December 11, 2008

Mean Girls.......and parents.

My poor Casey is having friend trouble, yet again. The girl just hangs out with the wrong crowd. Apparently they are considered the mean girls. Well, once again, they have turned on her. 6 girls ganging up on her. Calling her names and harassing her. She can't even get through lunch without one of them coming up to hear.

It started a few months back. Her and her BFF got into an argument. It has just spiraled out of control from there. You see, her BFF (I will just refer to her as BFF) and the family used to LOVE Casey. She spent a ton of time over there. When we were in FLA in April, they were there too. She spent several days with them instead of us. Us as parents, were on good terms. We never went out together, but attended kid parties ans stuff.

I wish I had my eyes more open to see what really happens in that family. The kids have no rules. They have a TON of friends over all the time. Swear and have no repect for the parents or grandmother who lives there. If they get grounded, it doesn't stick. They are even allowed to play "Ding Song Ditch" as long as they don't ring the bell of the old lady across the street!

So now, that whole crowd of girls are mad at Casey. They gather at BFF's house and the mother and grandmother feed into the arguement and make it worse. We found out the mother was telling the girls what a "bitch" Casey was. What adult does that? Needless to say, I picked up the phone and exchanged words with her. It was a wasted breath.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago. Casey was at a friends house who lives a few doors down from BFF. As always, BFF had about 5 people over. They asked Casey to come to the street to talk. When she got there, they spun it around that Casey wanted to fight them. Ummm......I saw the text messages and that TOTALLY wasn't the case. The GRANDMOTHER came out screaming at Casey! Calling her, get this....."Chicken Shit" and telling her to "Get the F**k back where she came frome!" UH! I was livid! I called once again and got into and arguement with the grandmother (who is in her 70's!) and the mother. How can adults be so immature? Wasted breath again.

It is totally out of control. I have contacted the school and have had talks with Casey. I the School Resource Officer on a personal level and asked him to have a "Cyber Bullying and bullying" talk with the girls. Within 1 hour, I had a call back that he sat ALL the girls in a conference room, with the VP and guidance, and spoke to them.

I feel so awful for her. She cries everyday and every night. She is trying to make new friends and of course the mean girls make fun of that. I try to tell her to take the higher road. Even Sam had great advice. "Kill them with Kindess" she said. When they give you dirty looks, smile back. When they call you a name "Say thanks!" and walk away.

What more can I do. Teenage girls are the worst. They are so mean. =(

11 comments:

Blissful Babe said...

Aww!! Poor honey!! I was Casey when I was little. Man that stinks. I hate that for her. The school years are supposed to be the best time of their lives, but instead, you have these little beasts mucking it all up.

Hang in there mom!!

SuZ said...

That's horrible. Teenage girls are the worst!! I would say let it roll off her back, but I know that's so hard to teach a teenager. I hope things get better for her, I truly do.

Firefly@www.firefly-shop.org said...

That must be so hard on her and you! I hope things get better soon, kids can be mean at any age but at that it seems the worst. I really wish there was something I can tell her to help, but having a similar experience myself… Oh men all I can tell her hang in there honey and don't give in. It can't last for long, and it's so great that you're involved and trying to help her go through this.
Hugs :)

DiPaola Momma said...

Oh it's like you are pulling pages from my teen years diary! I actually had the group of those type of "girls' (more like thugs in training) follow me home and try to beat me up. To this day my brothers (one is a COP) love to tell the story of how I kicked butts, the Irish in me. But that didn't solve anything. Where one ran annother took her place. Saddly there isn't much we can do for her. I'd love to tell her "Hey sweetie, you'll grow up and be a wonderful person. You'll be able to hold your head high and know you were above it. And remind them what asses they were when you make it to your 10 year reunion!". But mom, it's just one of those things she has to work through. Protect her, remind her how wonderful she is, hold her when she cries. That said, I'd look into a restraining order for or a visit to the "parents".. Maybe if they are faced with having to be held accountable for THEIR actions things will change! Keep me posted. How is Tommy feeling? Today is #3's 4th birthday.. time flies.

Stacey said...

That is so mean. I feel so bad for her. I remember those days. I agree with Sam. Kill them with kindness.

nikkicrumpet said...

Such a tough thing for a mom...because you feel so helpless...and it's so painful to see your kids hurting. And you are right...there is NOTHING meaner than a pack of teenage girls. I think the "killing them with kindness" is the best advice she'll get. It works really well...and it will make her the better person. I hope this gets resolved soon. Poor sweet thing!

Anna said...

Oh Rebecca! My heart aches for her. I hope she makes new, better, nicer friends. It's so sad that teenage life is like this!

Melanie said...

Teenage girls suck but someone should smack those parents/grandparents. That is just ridiculous. And people wonder what is wrong with the world today!?!

Kaycee said...

OMG! That is ridiculous!! It almost reminds me of that crazy woman that created the myspace and the girl killed herself :( (Not saying that will happen with Casey by any means) Just saying someone should do something about those stupid women! How childish.. Poor Casey, I HATED jr high! Kids are mean, at any age :(

Rebecca said...

Kaycee, that story of the girl has ran through my head a thousand times. It is so scary.

Karla said...

Ugh that is terrible Rebecca!!! I am sorry to hear that Casey is having a rough time!